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Words. Wisdom. Winners.
i still wanna play god…
this post goes out to the following target audience…
people who:
- love photography
- wud appreciate a photographer par excellance
- wudnt mind the photographer to be an extremely hot 28 yr old gal
- wudnt be turned off by the fact that she has 2 kids…and a bf
- wud go to all the first link below and spend atleast an hour on it…
- wudnt think that i have a huge crush on her…
__________________________
i rarely visit my flickr account. its usually only to upload snaps and the weekly check for any comments…which surprisingly have experienced a huge jump in number lately…!
so this afternoon..close to when i was almost done with all work for the day…i opened my account…and saw Rebecca’s latest snap
Rebecca…who…??
this is precisely the time you click on the link below…
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebba/
- she is the undisputed goddess of flickr
- simply the best self portraits i have seen (http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebba/sets/454414/)
- possible the best use of long exposure techniques (http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebba/sets/1260435/)
- she has mastered the art of multiplicity…something that i am fascinated by…and hv no clue to..(http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebba/sets/1058377/)
- and…she has clicked my fav snap of all times…(http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebba/32296282/in/set-72157594277460673/)
ofcourse…given the crappy me…i have analyzed her a lot…through her snaps…and at times her responses to the hazaar comments to her snaps…! and i must say that i am impressed…(i almost wrote obsessed here!)…more so since she is self taught…
i find her ability to look at life through her lens fascinating. i wonder what goes on in her head when she picks up the camera..and clicks. i wish i cud capture that moment..that brain wave..!
i even wish she wasnt as narcissistic…but then i still wanna play god….even with something so perfect…
~a
PS:
- apart from her flickr world…she also rests on her main page (http://www.rebekkagudleifs.com/)
- she is currently participating in some shitty shady competition…her profile is here. Somehow i wish she hadnt…but dont pay attention to my wish…just read the title to this entry…and move on..!!
back in time…
11.30pm
The Shangri-la, Dubai
the tv infront…switched off…the bed untouched…wood finish working table…a few pennies…a virgin kitchenette…the cupboard half open…jst the tablelamp on…
click
lights off…close my eyes…jst the darkness with me…
click click
the table infront of me…books on the shelves above…the incense stick almost done…matress behind with the lamp above…10 watt bulb…windows open….the girls outside…and i can feel the breeze…have to get the assignment done…but this is just so soothing…hv to read up for tomorrow’s class…but what the heck…its 3 in the morning…
Koi nahi hai koi bhi nahi
Na pass na durr
Ek pyaar hai
Dil ki dharkan
Apni chahat ka jo ellan kiye jaati hai
Zindagi hai jo jiye jaati hai
Khoon ke ghoont peay jaati hai
Khwaab kaanton se siye jaati hai
…
…
Yadoon ka jungle yeh dil
Kaanton se jal thal yeh dil
Chubtay kaanten yadoon ke daaman se chunta hoon
Girti deewaron ke aanchal mein zinda hoon
its these times that i realize the power of the human mind…
yesterday…for a moment…for just a moment…for just a very special moment…
…i was back at isb…
…i went back in time…
…and it was just so amazing…
…just so amazing…
yeh hai meri kahaani…
~a
love this part of me…
so this is cool…you work for 3 days and its time to go back home….!!
last weekend was a long one. was home for 4 days…took sunday off and monday was a public holiday. awesome fun. watched a movie…(Dor…quite a good watch..!)…and went for dandiya on saturday.
its funny how every thing remotely connected to dance…in delhi…has to turn into a bhangra one..! whats funnier is that no matter how much one cribs about it…you will definitely move your ass once it starts…!
so we had..none other than…the world famous…Bhupi…for the bhangra…oops…dandiya night..!! god..u shud hv seen the girls tearing their cholis apart….shouting “we loveeeeeee u bhupiiiiiiiiiiiiii”…and he doing that…”la la dhin chik dhin chik dhin chik…la dhin chik dhin chik dhin chik…” dance…!! the dandiya beats added to the punch…
and then the food was quite awesome…! it was shit expensive though…and i find it so fascinating how your atittude towards money keep evolving depending on how much you earn…
i remember the one time when i waited like anything for the x-files movies to release in India…i mean i waited…like crazy. and when i came…i thought…nahhh…its too expensive (and at 50 bucks a month as pocket money…it surely was)…will watch it later (and i did…4 yrs hence..when it came on TV..i saw it with my hands folded…it was religion for me..!!)…
and then those numerous times when you see something in the shop…and go…oh this looks so awesome…wonder how much it is……for….CRAP…!!! too expensive…
and now…by the grace of god…things are smooth…and the time spent on buying things is much lesser…! which makes me wonder…does hving money make u less of a ‘deal-seeker’…!! i mean…i remember that part of me which used to browse and browse thru shit loads of sites…before i cud find the cheapest possible deal on a particular item…(and a cheap deal is not a bad deal in my scheme of things…its value for money).
but today when i hv to buy a papri chaat…i bloody fork out 40 bucks…!! obviously thats not a deal…!! especially when you had that same precise shit about 4 hours back…for 15..!!!
people say money makes one powerful…!! yeah right…!! money simply makes u lazy…! it all boils down to convenience..!!
i hate this part of me…
so today…i spent 3 hours…ofcourse…in office…searching for a holiday package for my folks. and i searched and searched…searched like crazy..!! i didnt get the deal i was looking for…but in the process i did find myself back..!!
love this part of me…
~a
dubai survival kit…
so…SA…or AS…if you are readin this…pardon me…cause i really didnt have anything else to write…
its been 12 months for the ATK team here at Dubai…and we realized that its been quite a learning experience. a new country shall always come with its share of typicalities…and adjusting to those can be quite a task.
here is our version of the
Dubai Survival Kit
- Emirates will serve you good food. Air India will serve you food. Emirates has some really nice entertainment. Air India doesn’t believe in the concept. Emirates will fly on time. Air India will love you so much it just wouldn’t want you to leave the craft. Ever. FLY EMIRATES
- You arrive at the airport and the lady immigration officer is quite pretty. She has applied make up and you can actually see her face. And she even smiles at you. That doesn’t mean you can stare at her.
- When flying back to Dubai from India, you have to reconfirm your flights. Ofcourse the fact that you paid the entire amount for the flight and also got a confirmed seat doesn’t mean that you are interested in flying…does it?
- When in a team of more than 4, appoint someone who decides where to eat out every day. Change the person every week…to minimize the physical damage from other team members.
- Do check out the desert safari. The oasis comes in form of belly dancers at the end of it all.
- You are staying at the Crowne Plaza. Just by yourself. And at 2 in the morning you hear a knock. Do(n’t) open!
- Dubai is full of olives. And they look a lot like black grapes. They are not.
- Pepperoni is beef. Just because you have it everyday and like it a lot, doesn’t make it pork!
- Some people think that seafood is vegetarian. Most of these people stay in Dubai
- If your office is far from the main city, remember the route. You shall have to explain it EVERYDAY to the food delivery guy
- Don’t get overwhelmed by the grandiose nature of high-end Lebanese restaurants. Their attitude towards food is the same as that of Paris Hilton’s towards money. Waste it.
- For dinner there are two extremes. The AED20/person Sukh Sagar and the AED 200/person Burj. One will make you burp like you have never burped before and one will leave you hunting for that chips pack at midnight. Which one…is your guess.
- There are some things in Dubai that money cant buy. For instance an airconditioner when you are out at 12.30pm in august looking for an ATM.
- Hospitalization in Dubai is very expensive. Emergency treatment is free though. However, at a speed limit of 120km/hr, ‘emergency’ acquires a whole new meaning. Get yourself a medical cover.
- Ofcourse you love your wife/husband. And the worlds knows that. They don’t need evidence…definitely not in public.
- It’s a beautiful country and you would want to click incessantly. Control that emotion when attempting to click women in the national dress.
life’s good…
~a
awesome feeling….
my feet were literally shivering as i walked towards A-01. i cudnt even dare to see who lives there now…but there was this sudden rush that i experienced…when i sat on the very same stairs infront of the b-blk…
it was suddenly 6 months back…and it was the same time..the same place…the same me…and yet it somehow didnt belong to me..!! but it still was an awesome feeling…
spent 2 days at ISB…officially down for the Kearney recruitment talk…and had a BLAST! the sheer feeling of being back was too overwhelming. more so for SB who just cudnt stop feeling senti. the first night..he drank a bit and then we walked around the campus for some 45 minutes…in the rain…while he narrated stories from the 1st batch. and we were lucky enough to catch a dunking…post which he jst said..”now i can die in peace..!!”
the 1st evening was well received. the turnout was decent…but the enthu was contagious. somehow this batch hasnt failed to impress me with that.
its beautiful…how this single place…holds so much of fascination for me. the sheer thought of being there again makes me wanna do it right away…
ofcourse…on the flip side…i cudnt spend as much time with some people…as i wud hv liked to. so sorry AD, SS, SL…very soon..!!
54 hrs…6 hrs of sleep…
never felt so fresh before…
…awesome feeling…
~a
Dubai…by the dark….
64 sec exposure.
done in B/W on purpose
~a
same message…handled differently…
inspired
R and i were heading towards K’s place. catching up on life in the past 5 days…and planning the evening ahead. its rare that i listen to music in the car when with her…! but had burnt a new CD and (i dont know if someone else has it) there is this unusual excitement as to which will be the next song. cause you really dont remember when you had put them in an order…to be written…
kaise tujhko dikhaun yahaan hai kya
Maine jharne se paani maa
tod ke piya hai
Guchcha guchcha kai khwabon ka
uchal ke chuwa hai
Chaaya liya bhali dhoop yahaan hai
Naya naya sa hai roop yahan
Yahaan sab kuch hai maa phir bhi
lage bin tere mujhko akela
i kept drivin…she kept looking out her window…there was no talk…
…and we looked at each other…and we had tears in our eyes…
unfortunately i have never really credited cinema with much. i know that SRK has a lot to do with this…but seriously…’bollywood/hollywod/crapwook’ never held any value for me except for pure viewing pleasure. it was rarely that i came out of a screening all shaken up…contemplating…thinking about what just struck me…! there are only a few movies that went that far…
1. Pi
2. The Shawshank Redemption
3. A Clockwork Orange
4. Requim for a dream
5. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
6. City of God
7. Motorcycle Diaries
8. American History X
9. The Matrix
10.The Fight Club
11.Schindler’s List
And no…i am not an angrez who swears by hollywood…! there have been quite a few (unfortunately…a few) movies in hindi that still have me in awe. Anand, 3 deewarein (shit…i really have to think hard here..!)
However, 2 movies lately have fascinated me…
and that…finally…is the theme of today’s entry..
Rang De Basanti
The movie made me feel pathetic…about my life. I figured that no matter what MG says…at somepoint of time i will have to stand infront of the mirror and be hard on myself. at somepoint of time i will have to question my very existence…and my purpose. its surely not to sit infront of a laptop and churn our excel sheets. its certainly not to get married and see my kids become the finest kids ever..! and its surely surely not to get that bloody hasselblad of my last post.
And this movie…made me question all of that. it got so hard on me…that each time i spend lavishly on something…there is a certain guilt that takes over. and that guilt doesnt easily go when i sign that monthly check to CRY. infact it gets only bigger. it only reminds me that as an individual i feel that offering money is my excuse to exist. i dont even know where the money is going…!!
this movie made me realize the power of cinema. the reservation protests…the opening of the priyadarshini mattoo case…the retrial of the jessica lal case…were as if retakes of the same movie. it literally reawakened an entire generation…
and i am not far behind….
Lage raho Munnabhai
Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant. It made me laugh…made me cry…made me think…and more importantly…left a message so powerful…and in such a subtle manner…that it was only later that i reazlied what a stroke of genius this was.
i personally never really had a strong opinion on Gandhi. ofcourse…it takes a lot to move an entire nation and i dont know how many of us are capable of doing so…(and no…mallika sherawat is not what i am talking about…!)..! so the respect is there. but apart from that…i used to feel…what if we had resorted to violence…wud we have gotten our independence a decade earlier…?
but what the movie made me realize was that i at my own small level have been practising the same thing..! i am not the agressive sorts…rarely will i raise my voice…and if i think about it…my way of dealing with things has truly helped me. dont know if it would work with someone else…but for me…the main idea is that if the other person is wrong…make him feel guilty about it…so so guilty about it that he never does it again. but do it in a manner that he himself realizes it…and is not forced upon by society and laws. its hard…cause it takes a lot of time…but it works…works wonderfully..!
silence…is the best weapon…! i love this in me…narcissistic or whatever…tht silence coms naturally to me. people think that simply slapping someone is the best form of retaliation…however…silence is the cruelist..!
gandhigiri…or whatever you may want to call it…found itself redefined through the movie.
contrast
RDB shoke me…munnabhai amused me.
RDB made me feel horrible within…munnabhai consoled me of my potential
RDB was shock therapy…munnabhai was ‘Patch Adams’
2 movies…almost the same message…almost diametrically opposite ways of treating…
~a
PS: help me with hindi movies that can create the same effect.
communities….
as MG pointed out in last evening’s conversation…i tend to worry a lot.
and i agree…
out of all the things that make me question our existence on a daily basis..there is one that has been troubling me for quite sometime now..! sleepness nights…bouts of anxiety and depression…breathlessness…and sudden heartpains usually accompany the thought….and there is no escapin..
in search for my quest for freedon…i turn to you…please help me…
WHAT IN GOD’S NAME WAS THIS DUDE THINKING…WHEN HE CREATED THIS THREAD…!
here is a game …..its called SLAP SLAP SLAP ;)
very simple
just slap the person above n state the reason why he/she deserves the phaataaaaak ;)
OH NO NO…THATS NOT IT….
How old do you think the person above you is… make a guess
Dont peek into profiles ….k…
BETTER STILL…
I have seen this game on another channel but its fun:)
If ur daddy arranges ur marraige wid the person abouve u ……wht u will do……
AND THIS TAKES THE TROPHY
An interesting game…Just tell…what u wanna do with the above person…….
1. Shake Hand
2. A Hug
3. A Kiss
4. A Kick
5. A Slap
6. A Look
7. A Smile
8. A Wink ;)
9. Dont want to even look at
10.Ask her/him out
12.Walk away
Let’s start….
and if the pain wasnt enough…its always heartening to see that each of these historic milestones have gotten more than 10,000 REPLIESSS………!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
these gem of a masterpiece were created on what could potentially be the biggest threat to manking after AIDS…! and its called orkut..!
i am telling you guys..(and PK knows this already)…very soon google will be controlling our relationships. we email through it…chat through it…make friends through it…and then search for stuff to kill then with through it…!
very soon…
~a
PS: on a different and a much happier note…i have finally…after years of search…found my dream machine. i know an upgrade will come by as soon as i post this…but then…what the heck…i am in love with this…
The Hasselblad Digital SLR
At USD 30,000…my calculations predict exactly 4.386 generations before i lay my hands on this…!
life has really moved on….
i believe that nature has a wonderful way of telling you what to do next…or to make you realize that what you are doing shouldnt be done. and the best part is that it will do so in a manner that will make you believe it was your own choice…all the way…
i saw Swades last night. was a tad dissapointed. possible because i was watching it at a time when dozens of praises had already been registered by my conscience. so i was expecting a lot more than i got. somehow…i cant credit SRK with much. no matter how powerful the script…something has to happen to certify SRK as the hero of the movie. i didnt get the point of the scene wherein he was trying to generate electricity through the turbine and had to pull out that straw bunch after the turbine failed to reach 230 volts. PLEASE…why does HE have to be the one doing it…when there were hundred others. not that he used his NASA knowledge to figure out what the problem was…!!
anyways…i am loosing track. the movie wasn’t powerful. it didnt hit me. i did cry one occasion…but that surely wasnt cause of the powr of the script.
what struck me though…and this is where i link myself to the 1st para…was his reason to come back. he felt that his life has moved on…in a way that had left others behind…people who at some point of time were really precious to him.
and when i think of myself…i figure i am no different.
Today is the 5th of Sep…and i know that i havent called someone when i should have…(and who i did call for 4 years before i just stopped…one fine day). I do send her flowers every year…but havent met her since 1.5 yrs…! and come to think of it…at one point of time…she was the most important person in my life. someone who literally ‘made’ me…what i am today…!
Today is the 5th of Sep…and i wrote to him after almost a month (and after watching the movie). there was a time when we wouldnt go to sleep before talking to each other. when he used to call me at random hours…and we used to chat for hours thereafter. when i used to keep my landline under my blanket so as to not disturb my folks from the ringtone that would come at 2 in the morning…! and even though i still think of him as my closest guy friend…i shudder on the thought that it must just be on paper
Today is the 5th of Sep…and its been alsmost 2 weeks sinc ei have met her. when i left for dubai this time around…she told me…”i kept waiting for you…ab aayega nandu…ab aayega nandu…”…and i had tears in my eyes. i realized that an effort that will take me 30 mins…will give her priceless happiness. and yet i chose to be lazy…
Today is the 5th of Sep…and i didnt watch Swades for all that i am feeling. i choose to watch it for what i had heard about it…! and yet nature…had its way of telling me…”dude…u cudnt hv expected more out of SRK…but u sure did realize something that you were doing wrong…”
live has surely moved on…
~a
long time….
thanks daddy for reminding me…i had been procastinating…partly cause i wanted to…partly cause i didnt have a choice…
work has been maddening lately…i was ‘almost’ handling 2 projects at the same time for the past 3 days…hv slept not more than 4 hours at a stretch in the past 3 nights…and have been almost labelled as a zombie by the man in the mirror.
bday…came and went…though it was quite relaxed. after a long time spent it with family…met R in the evening…cut a cake…and all..!
however, i have never ever had so many people wishing me…
- 221 orkut scraps (my bosses would be happy to note that none of my replies to all of these scraps came during office hours!)
- 28 emails (wow…!)
- 15 sms-es (and i thought that sms-es were the way to go…for the future)
- 11 phone calls
thank you…orkut birthday reminder…www.birthdayalarm.com…yahoo reminders….google alerts…outlook calendar….
…
dad is doing much better…will be starting office this week…inshallah…(!)…the doctors were really happy with his progress and it was during the review session did they disclose that he had literally come out from the most severe form of infection that could have hit his pancreas..!
happy news…
- daddy got his visa…so he shall be leaving for yankee land very soon…
- my final settlement from NIS (yes…the same company i used to work for some 1000 days back..!!)…came…and i am slightly rich now
- almost…almost…completed the model that i was working on…to some awesome relief…
- have a 3 day weekend this time…and am going for a road trip on saturday….wassssuuuupppp
life’s good…
~a
PS: daddy..(and this is god damn the 3rd time i am mentioning you)…there was one girl that didnt like me when she 1st met me…and i am to marry her next year…! i guess that was the criteria..! :)
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