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There is always a reason behind how we feel.
If the reason for that feeling is someone else, why blame ourselves?
It will pass.
If we are the reason, why blame someone else?
It’s time to fix it.
The key is to find the source.

Our feelings are self-imposed. If we can create them, we can end them too.

If given a chance to trade anything of the wealthiest people, what is the right thing to trade?

Their money? Status? Network? Hard work? Life Lessons?

The best thing to trade for is their curiosity.
What do they think about the most? What is the pattern of their thinking? What are their mental models?

Curiosity can make us figure out a way to make a motor car in a world where everyone wants a faster horse cart. 

Lack of it, can make us believe we are meant for slow commutes forever.

Having the wealth of the wealthy is like eating fish.
Having their curiosity is learning how to fish. 

To go for the career of your choice. It’s risky.
To choose your happiness over society’s validation. It’s risky.
To leave the comfort and chart for new territories. It’s risky

Of course it is risky. But isn’t not taking that risk a bigger risk?

Your biggest enemy is not your competitor.
Or a newbie changing the world.
Or a viral trend you missed.

These are parts of life.

Your biggest enemy is someone who tells you that it is impossible for you to think beyond what lies in front of you. They make you think small because they want you to be one, even if unintentionally. It could even be your closest friends or family.

“You cannot move further.” 

Anyone who tells this to you, is the one who is your responsibility to move further away from your life. 

You’re starting something you’ve never done. It’s making you anxious. You find yourself lacking confidence.

What if I fail? What if I’m laughed at? What if my critics say: “I told you!”

It’s impossible to have 100% confidence when you’re starting something new. 

It’s 100% possible to know that you will figure it out.
That you care about your progress more than what people think of you.
That even if you fail, you will own it and make it better.

Confidence that you don’t have confidence as of now but will figure things out is the only confidence you ought to have.

Someone was kind to you for a long time.
Now, all of a sudden they’ve become rude.

This leaves you questioning.
How could they change? Why did they change? Did I do something wrong?
Somehow it has started affecting your self worth in that relationship. 

Here’s the truth: People don’t change. They just surface. Depending on their life circumstances or even the situations. 

When we accept people for where they are, we don’t do them a favour. We do one to ourselves. 

I’ll be happy when I find my partner.
I’ll be happy when my parents understand me.
I’ll be happy when my efforts are applauded.

I’ll be happy “when”…

When we attach a “when” to happiness, we make it conditional. Someone else has to take the responsibility to do something that will make us happy. That’s a huge onus to place on those who aren’t even aware they are carrying a heavy load.

The safer and more convenient option is to own our happiness. To be able to control our factors and definition of happiness. To be happy alone.

Happiness in relationships is not contingent. Happiness is a relationship with ourselves. When we have that relationship right, we become happier in all other relationships.

If it made you happy yesterday, don’t put the pressure on it to make you happy today as well.

We humans change. External things don’t.

A wiser choice is to pick something different that matches your current state of happiness.

One of the happiest definitions of happiness is to know that happiness isn’t rigid. Nothing could be a happier realisation!

I often talk about suggesting kids in their 20s to go about exploring different career options. 

But what should you do when you have really found what you love, you’re good at it and the world is ready to pay you for it?

Double down on what you’ve found. Think of what all could be possible and what kindles the fire in you. Ask yourself what is the next level in the field you’ve picked.

And then, work super hard on being the best at it.

Exploration never stops. Vertical one just follows horizontal. Rinse and repeat.

As humans, leaders and wise humans, we love to solve problems for others. It makes us feel better, and we believe that it would make them feel better as well.

Except, that it doesn’t.

Smart people suffer from a problem called The Curse of Intelligence. They want to solve things fast. Make everything aligned. Remove the chaos. 

It hardly helps anyone. The one whose problem needs to be solved – the company, the family or friend have a certain way of operating that is different from who we are as an individual.

A really smart way is to ask questions. Questions help them understand the problem better. So do they help us. 

The best part? The one seeking for help gets it in the manner best for them.