Words. Wisdom. Winners.

5 questions you need to ask yourself in tough situations

  1. What else could this mean?

For example, “My boss isn’t talking to me because she hates me!”
Well, maybe that’s true. Maybe it is not.
“What else could it mean?”

Go beyond your most obvious explanations.

  1. What is this telling me?

My teammates are always telling me that I am too nice.
I don’t like that.
But “what is this truly telling me?”

Our emotions/situations/circumstances are always telling us something.
Listen to them.

  1. Forget the world. WHAT DO I WANT TO DO?
    We are often caught up in what we think we should do, or what the world expects us to do.
    Whenever in doubt, ask yourself – What do I want to do?
    Truly want to do.
  2. Will this matter 3 months from now?

Our emotions are real. So real that they seem permanent.
But they are not.

Once the emotions are gone and we have given ourselves time and space, will what we are going through still matter?

  1. What is the worst thing that will happen? Will I be okay if it happens?

Our mind creates worst case scenarios and forces us not to take action to protect us from danger.

Once we imagine them vividly, we realise that most worst cases are not that bad.
It’s just in our head.

The embarrassment tee

It’s a really tight tee that showed all my bulges.

It was gifted to me 10 years back, by my then-colleague (who also became my trainer), Ajay Singh. 

He said, “Wear this tee every day when you go to work out. And look in the mirror.
It should embarrass you.”

“You should realise that you have not respected your body all these years (which was true for me back then) and you have to keep wearing this tee until one day, you feel proud of who you become, for your own self.”

I felt it was a wonderful way to motivate myself. 

I wore it every single day for a year, and every time I feel I am disrespecting my body by eating junk, I wear it to remind myself of who I can become if I decide to!

The beauty about this embarrassment tee is that it isn’t just for fitness.
It is for every walk of life. 

We all can “wear” an embarrassment tee every day – to college, to work, in our relationships.

So that when we look at ourselves in that situation, we know we can become better. 

We know we can feel better.
We know we can do better.
We know we can act better. 

And we continue to wear that tee every day, until we begin to like who we have become.

5 things to do in the first 90 days of your job

1. Avoid the Curse of Intelligence

Smart people directly go to solving problems, when they should rather be asking, “Why do things happen the way they do?”
In the enthusiasm of fixing new problems, we ignore history.
When we ignore history, we end up rewriting it. 

2. Meet people who are nothing like you

Have lunch, build connections, and network without any intent.
Even with those who have nothing to do with your work and are different from you.
You have the most to learn from them.

3. Sharpen your axe

Your goal is not to impress people in the first 90 days.
Your goal is to listen, observe, and take notes.
So that when the real work comes your way, you will have all the arms and ammunition to do a fantastic job.

4. Seek feedback

Unless you do something dramatically wrong, everyone is going to be nice to you.
It is your job to seek meaningful feedback.
The more specific you get, the more value you derive.

5. Do not share your opinions

Your intent is not to change things in a way to challenge or show them the mirror.
Keep your opinions to yourself for the first 3 months, to check if they truly hold ground later on. 

The importance of help

08th April 2022. 

I was about to finish my Instagram Live session, when I invited Ankan to come live with me.
He was a 10th class student from West Bengal.
And he was struggling to pay his school fees, because of which he might not be able to sit for his exams.

I offered to help him with his school fees.

The expression on his face was priceless. He couldn’t believe it.
I, honestly, was quite emotional as the session came to an end.

Seeing someone struggle so hard to fulfil their desire to study, is heartbreaking.
It was a harsh reminder of the privilege me and my family enjoy, where we take such things for granted.

A few months later, I got the wonderful news that he cleared his class 10th board exams, securing 91.4%!

The power of help is beautiful!

Help, because you can.
Help, because it flows forward.
Help, because you too will need it one day.

6 habits for the rest of your life

1. Sleep 7+ hours
While it’s “cool” to skip your sleep, our brain’s most development happens only when we sleep. 

2. Eat healthy at least 3 times a day; avoid sugar/fried
You won’t see the effect of junk food on your body in your 20s, however, it starts hitting badly once you hit your 30s.

3. Read 15 minutes every day
One of the life changing habits for me!

3. Exercise/Walk 5 times a week
In a healthy body lives a rich mind. Period.

4. Do nothing for 5 minutes everyday – no phone, book, music, person.
Just you, sitting by yourself.

6. Schedule distraction time (of an hour) in a day for social media.
It helps you not get attracted to that “forbidden fruit” and actually look forward to “wasting” your time!

What India’s loss teaches us

India’s loss in the finals was devastating.
But it is a strong reminder of how life works. 

You may win everything leading up to the day that you need to win.
And if that day doesn’t go your way, the world may call you a loser. 

But it’s how you feel within that determines whether you won or not. 

I firmly believe they were the best team of the tournament and it is tragic that we lost.
But that doesn’t reduce them. 

As much as it hurts to not see them win, I hope they feel like winners within.

We certainly see the team that way ??

7 things I wish we were told in our 20s

1. The most useful thing from school/college is not what we learnt inside class.
Instead, it is what we learnt outside of class.

2. Money buys things.
But the bigger (and more important) thing that money buys is freedom.
The freedom to do anything you want!

3. Parents are humans first.
That means they will make mistakes.
They did make mistakes.
And those mistakes costed us a lot.
But we can heal.

4. None of your haters will ever be doing better than you.

5. Whatever you are feeling today, no matter how painful or joyful, will fade away eventually.

6. Real failure, when young, is not failing.
It is getting so scared of failing again, that you stop trying!

7. We have only one life.
We do not have to live it with only one identity.

5 questions to know someone better

1. Pick between speed and perfection. Why?

2. What do you think matters more — the course you study or the institute where you study?

3. If you never had to work for money, what would you be doing in life?

4. What is the worst thing about you?

5. What is the role you play in your friend’s lives?

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