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I’ll be happy when I find my partner.
I’ll be happy when my parents understand me.
I’ll be happy when my efforts are applauded.

I’ll be happy “when”…

When we attach a “when” to happiness, we make it conditional. Someone else has to take the responsibility to do something that will make us happy. That’s a huge onus to place on those who aren’t even aware they are carrying a heavy load.

The safer and more convenient option is to own our happiness. To be able to control our factors and definition of happiness. To be happy alone.

Happiness in relationships is not contingent. Happiness is a relationship with ourselves. When we have that relationship right, we become happier in all other relationships.

If it made you happy yesterday, don’t put the pressure on it to make you happy today as well.

We humans change. External things don’t.

A wiser choice is to pick something different that matches your current state of happiness.

One of the happiest definitions of happiness is to know that happiness isn’t rigid. Nothing could be a happier realisation!

I often talk about suggesting kids in their 20s to go about exploring different career options. 

But what should you do when you have really found what you love, you’re good at it and the world is ready to pay you for it?

Double down on what you’ve found. Think of what all could be possible and what kindles the fire in you. Ask yourself what is the next level in the field you’ve picked.

And then, work super hard on being the best at it.

Exploration never stops. Vertical one just follows horizontal. Rinse and repeat.

As humans, leaders and wise humans, we love to solve problems for others. It makes us feel better, and we believe that it would make them feel better as well.

Except, that it doesn’t.

Smart people suffer from a problem called The Curse of Intelligence. They want to solve things fast. Make everything aligned. Remove the chaos. 

It hardly helps anyone. The one whose problem needs to be solved – the company, the family or friend have a certain way of operating that is different from who we are as an individual.

A really smart way is to ask questions. Questions help them understand the problem better. So do they help us. 

The best part? The one seeking for help gets it in the manner best for them.

When we talk about secrets to productivity, mostly we think they would be Pomodoro technique, having a schedule, working out, etc.

While all of that is true, there is something way bigger than it: Our rest schedule.

Rest and rejuvenation is not sitting idle, wasting time, and something to be done when we will have more time. It is rather a way of getting more productive. Because even when we are not doing “work” on the outside, amidst the games that we play, the music that we work on or maybe while folding clothes, the mind is working on its own patterns to bring us our solutions.

And that, in turn, accelerates our productivity.

When you’ll do things their way, they will be happy.
And so you kill your own happiness to make them happy.

However, they still don’t get happy.
Guess what happens? You aren’t happy either.

Why not do what makes you happy?

If you’re getting it right for others, you are certainly not getting it right at all.

Of course a gap year “wastes” a year of your life.

However, if we get prepared for 15+ years to work – why make a choice of what to work on immediately?

How will we ever get to know the depth of the pool without stepping into it?

How will we ever know what we are good at if we don’t try what all we could be good at?

A gap year is simply the stopping at the petrol pump to give much needed fuel to the long drive of your career. 

Without it, we may be in an illusion of the car while in reality it is stagnant.

If it made you happy yesterday, don’t put the pressure on it to make you happy today as well.

We humans change.
External things don’t.

A wiser choice is to pick something different that matches your current state of happiness.

One of the happiest definitions of happiness is to know that happiness isn’t rigid.
Nothing could be a happier realization!

You should not stop watching news because someone on the Internet tells you to stop watching news.

You should stop watching news because your brain cannot focus on the good if it is being fed the bad that is happening around.

Making decisions from a point of why we want to do them makes them stick vis-a-vis doing them without awareness of reason.

Most of us have been raised to study, work hard, and get a comfortable job.

Except that most of us want to pursue something else that we love.
So we work toward it.
Waiting for that big break.
Waiting for someone to recognise us.
Or the least, to get at least one chance.

If we work hard and if we’re lucky, we somehow get that chance. 

But what happens after that chance? 

Do we work harder or do we become complacent?
Do we underpromise and overdeliver or do we commit and don’t fulfill it?
Do we become more fierce or do we lose our fire?

Shah Rukh Khan was once asked the reason behind his success, to which he replied,
“Most people work hard to get a chance. But no one works as hard as me after getting a chance.”

Working hard when you don’t even have to gives success when you don’t even ask for it.