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It is not you who changes your environment.
Your environment changes you.

That is why it is critical to pick the right environment.
Or move away from the wrong ones.

This applies to every aspect of life.

College.
Work.
Friends.
Partner.
Family.
Relatives.

Everyone is carrying a burden.
We just see ours.

Be kind to people.
Be kind to yourself.
Always.

Different career streams to choose from.
Two job offers to pick from.
Deciding whom to build a relationship with.

There are numerous such instances where we face two not so obvious choices to make. And we often find ourselves saying, “I don’t know what to do.”

Do we really not know?

I think mostly we all know what to do. But we crave to know if it’s the right decision. We spend an inordinate time analysing, researching, planning, debating, thinking – in the hope to get to the right decision.

But we won’t ever know if it’s the right decision, until we make the decision.
And this thought paralyses us.

When we say “I don’t know what to do,” what we usually imply is, “I don’t know if the decision I make will work out or not”.

We don’t fear making the decision.
We fear an undesirable outcome.

We all have a definition of who is a poor person. Someone who doesn’t have a lot of money

That’s financial poverty.

But there is another definition of poverty – mental poverty.

A state where someone is not satisfied with what they have, no matter how much that is.
A state where we fail to recognize that we already have a lot to be grateful for.
A state where one is consistently in need of more, because they never have enough.

Financial poverty is visible to others, mental poverty lies within.
Some people are so poor that all they have is money.

Lots of work on the list?
Several hindrances?
Unable to focus?

Do you also sometimes feel the same way about your work?

No matter how much you try to focus on your important tasks, the hindrance just keeps coming up. It’s almost repeated on an endless loop.

The real task then is the hindrance that comes in your work.

That problem that keeps repeating itself is your task.
The individual that doesn’t help you reach your goal is the one you need to have a conversation with.
The distraction that doesn’t let you focus, is what you have to manage first.

What hinders your task is your task.

5 signs of a job worth staying in:

1. You are respected for who you are.
2. There is acknowledgment of what you do.
3. You are rewarded for how well you do it.
4. There is growth while you do it.
5. You are mentored when you lose track.

1 sign of a toxic job:

You dread going to work everyday.

“Was it okay?
Did you like what I said?
Do I look good?
Do you love me?”

Of all the needs that we have, the need for validation always makes us weak.

Waiting for someone else to tell us that we are right.
Asking people to be our cheerleaders, because we can’t be our own.
Basing our identity on the perceptions and stories of others.
What if we started telling ourselves that we are enough?

What if we knew that it’s okay to be a work in progress?

How would things change if we knew from within that we are doing our best, and raising the bar every single day?

Till the time we base our identity on what others think, we will keep getting weaker.
And never discover how strong we truly are within.

Imagine there is a movie of your life and you are the main character.

Ask yourself — when people are watching the movie of your life, what will they keep hoping for you to do in your life?

What would they hope, beg, scream, plead for you to do right now in this moment?
Because that is the only thing that you should do.

Maybe you are afraid of doing it.

But this may be the push you needed.

If there is a difficult conversation in the relationship and the person in front of you becomes defensive, say these things to give them assurance:

“I am sharing this with you because I care about us.

I don’t want to attack you.

I know it may not seem like it, but I am not your enemy. I can never be your enemy.

This is not a battle between you and me. It is a battle between us and this situation.

I know you are feeling defensive because of my words, but I really want to understand you.

Please talk to me. It is important for me that both of us are able to say difficult things to each other and feel safe while saying them.”

Ever thought of asking for something on social media AND actually getting it?

I was scrolling on Twitter one day, when I came across this Tweet:
“I just need someone to take me to a bookstore and pay my bill.”

I am all in favour of having no budget for books and learning materials.
Because they are an investment in yourself and provide IMMENSE value, which will pay off over time through the better opportunities you get access to.

So, I agreed and connected Vanshita with one of my team members to host her.

32 books later, the Tweet became a reality!

Not only did this lovely incident bring a smile on my face, but it also reminded me of one of my favourite quotes:

“If you don’t ask, the answer is always no.”