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Whenever you go through a difficult life situation, the world advises you to move on.

I’d suggest otherwise.

Don’t move on immediately.
Reflect.
Spend time with yourself.
Ask yourself “What is it trying to teach you?”
Get comfortable with what happened.
Take the time to make it a life lesson instead of life tragedy.

And over time, you would have moved on automatically.

The way out of bad things in life isn’t by running away from them. It is rather by staying with them, so that over time and after giving all the lessons they brought, they go themselves and never come back again.

People love to help others. Influencers love to help. People with “outward success” love to help others.

However, when we do not receive help, it may also be because of the fact we were not specific.

“I feel bad.”
“Give me any job.”

OR

“I do not feel seen when X happens…”
“I have done x, y and z at work, and this is how I would be able to do a, b and c for you…”

People would love to help if they are helped on the kind of help they are being sought for – which unfortunately most people don’t do the hard work on. Don’t be most people :)

People don’t change. They just reveal themselves.
It’s your responsibility to be with people who are worth your time.

Can you think of a good friend who recently turned toxic?
Guess what? They were toxic all of the time.

You just didn’t realize it before, because subconsciously you believed they’d change. For the better.

Now you believe they have changed, for the worse.

No, they haven’t! They have just revealed that part of themselves that you had ignored for the longest time.

Now that you know that people don’t change, it’s not weird, it’s liberating.

Because you now know whom you can choose to spend your time with.

Isaac Newton attributed the secret of his success to the fact that he stood on the shoulder of giants.

So is the case with every success we achieve.
No one is self-made, even though it looks on the outside.
Behind our victory are multiple people who saw the best in us when we lost it for ourselves, and those are the shoulders we were blessed to stand on.

No one gets it done alone. No one.

The biggest myth about life is that we can get successful without ever facing failure.

That’s the biggest failure.

The most successful people are the ones who fail the most. And choose to reflect instead of regret.

Not needing someone else’s validation.
Or adhering to their definition of success.
Or sticking to the status quo because everyone else does it.

They are uncomfortable and unhappy doing it, yet they do it because no one told them that they can stop!

If there’s only one thing you need to You don’t need to do what everyone else is doing, and you will end up accomplishing what everyone else accomplishes.

Don’t lose yourself because you found somebody.

I am not talking about relationships.

I am talking about everything!

Got a great job? Doesn’t mean you don’t need ‘me time’.
Got friends you love? Doesn’t mean you won’t stand for your choices.
Got a great family? Doesn’t mean that your individual needs don’t matter.

You matter.

Your choices matter even if you are ‘happy’ on the outside.

You can never be truly yourself unless you nurture yourself in the middle of everything you are blessed to have!

People get most upset when you tell them the true things that they wish are false.

It is perhaps your fault.
You could have done better.
Maybe you could be more understanding.

In a problem, there is often more than one person involved. However, if one person could have acted different, things would have been different. Certainly for the better.

But to own that different thing requires being okay with the truth that we wish was false.

When people are looking for more lies to cover up their lies and you tell them the truth, they don’t like it.

Truth never gets loved. Because it stands alone.

‘Oh, you are now going to tell me what to do? Have you looked at yourself?’

The biggest mistake people make is to reject the right advice because it comes from someone who didn’t take the advice themselves.

Ever saw someone giving advice who themselves did not follow it?

It is not them who is speaking.
It is their regret.
It is their ‘what if’.

It is their unbearable pain of ‘not being able to go back in time’ that makes them give that advice.

Perhaps that is the reason they are giving that advice!
Caring about the advice more than the source of it sometimes could be redemption!
Often, for more than one person.

Best way to become a good listener?

In a conversation, don’t speak unless asked to.

You cannot be a good listener and speak the most in a conversation.
Only when you decide to speak when asked to, do you listen to everything that is not even said.

The one who listens, reflects and creates something new.

The one who speaks before they are asked to, simply amplifies what they already know. And what they don’t.