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Words. Wisdom. Winners.
What defines you?
I was absolutely wrong about the world, while in school.
I was the diligent, studious, and obedient kid.
But there were kids around me who weren’t.
And I looked down upon them.
I thought those who smoke, drink, do not study and do not obey were evil people.
I felt righteous in my approach.
And felt right to judge them!
But I was wrong.
Most of those kids have gone on to do meaningful things in life.
One of them runs a big chemist shop.
He went out of his way to source medicines for my mom during the 2nd wave of COVID.
When we had lost all hope.
I am not proud of the judgemental person that I was back then.
And I am glad that life taught me to act better and be better, in the best manner possible.
In the end, how you treat people defines who you truly are!
Conversations
When we point a finger at someone else, we are unable to join hands together.
When we think someone else is wrong, we hardly stop to think they could be right in their shoes.
When we confront, it is in accusation mode instead of access mode.
It’s easy to win conversations by gathering all the evidence against someone, it’s difficult to gather all the reasons why they could be perfectly right.
Instead of winning conversations, having one helps.
Self-imposed feelings
There is always a reason behind how we feel.
If the reason for that feeling is someone else, why blame ourselves?
It will pass.
If we are the reason, why blame someone else?
It’s time to fix it.
The key is to find the source.
Our feelings are self-imposed. If we can create them, we can end them too.
Borrowing from the richest
If given a chance to trade anything of the wealthiest people, what is the right thing to trade?
Their money? Status? Network? Hard work? Life Lessons?
The best thing to trade for is their curiosity.
What do they think about the most? What is the pattern of their thinking? What are their mental models?
Curiosity can make us figure out a way to make a motor car in a world where everyone wants a faster horse cart.
Lack of it, can make us believe we are meant for slow commutes forever.
Having the wealth of the wealthy is like eating fish.
Having their curiosity is learning how to fish.
It’s risky
To go for the career of your choice. It’s risky.
To choose your happiness over society’s validation. It’s risky.
To leave the comfort and chart for new territories. It’s risky
Of course it is risky. But isn’t not taking that risk a bigger risk?
Your biggest enemy
Your biggest enemy is not your competitor.
Or a newbie changing the world.
Or a viral trend you missed.
These are parts of life.
Your biggest enemy is someone who tells you that it is impossible for you to think beyond what lies in front of you. They make you think small because they want you to be one, even if unintentionally. It could even be your closest friends or family.
“You cannot move further.”
Anyone who tells this to you, is the one who is your responsibility to move further away from your life.
Confidence for doing new things
You’re starting something you’ve never done. It’s making you anxious. You find yourself lacking confidence.
What if I fail? What if I’m laughed at? What if my critics say: “I told you!”
It’s impossible to have 100% confidence when you’re starting something new.
It’s 100% possible to know that you will figure it out.
That you care about your progress more than what people think of you.
That even if you fail, you will own it and make it better.
Confidence that you don’t have confidence as of now but will figure things out is the only confidence you ought to have.
Why do people change?
Someone was kind to you for a long time.
Now, all of a sudden they’ve become rude.
This leaves you questioning.
How could they change? Why did they change? Did I do something wrong?
Somehow it has started affecting your self worth in that relationship.
Here’s the truth: People don’t change. They just surface. Depending on their life circumstances or even the situations.
When we accept people for where they are, we don’t do them a favour. We do one to ourselves.
I’ll be happy when…
I’ll be happy when I find my partner.
I’ll be happy when my parents understand me.
I’ll be happy when my efforts are applauded.
I’ll be happy “when”…
When we attach a “when” to happiness, we make it conditional. Someone else has to take the responsibility to do something that will make us happy. That’s a huge onus to place on those who aren’t even aware they are carrying a heavy load.
The safer and more convenient option is to own our happiness. To be able to control our factors and definition of happiness. To be happy alone.
Happiness in relationships is not contingent. Happiness is a relationship with ourselves. When we have that relationship right, we become happier in all other relationships.
On happiness
If it made you happy yesterday, don’t put the pressure on it to make you happy today as well.
We humans change. External things don’t.
A wiser choice is to pick something different that matches your current state of happiness.
One of the happiest definitions of happiness is to know that happiness isn’t rigid. Nothing could be a happier realisation!
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