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We are drawn towards people that have the same points of view as us.
They make us feel comfortable.
They make us feel safe.
Our worldviews, our belief systems, our values are held intact.

However, they don’t make us grow.
They simply validate our existing cocoon of beliefs.

If you truly want to grow, surround yourself with people who are totally unlike you, looking at whom you feel, “Iske saath toh hangout nahi ho paayega bhai. Yeh kaise ghus gaye?”
Those are the people you must spend your time with.

The next time you see someone and your response is, “They’re not my type,” ask yourself, “What is it that they know that I don’t?”
And then spend your time knowing them.
You’ll know more about the world than you did before.

You are irritated by the behaviour of others.
It frustrates you..
And they don’t even realise it.

So to teach them a lesson, you do the same thing to them.
Only, that it does not change them.
They do not see their fault through your actions.
There now remains no difference between them and you. 

“Now you know how it feels” is almost always the worst way to teach someone a lesson.

You want your point to be heard. After all, you are right.

The other person also believes the same.

The reality is that both of you are right. With a different lens to view the world. 

The best way to win the conversation, then, is to listen to them. It is in listening to them that we will also feel heard.

Don’t try to win conversations, try to have them instead.

Your colleagues are doing better than you.
The classmate who flunked in school is doing better.
Everyone’s life seems sorted, other than your own.

And all this makes you worried.
Perhaps jealous of their success.

But why are we jealous of it?
Because we are not focused on our own success.
We are not busy and lost working hard for ourselves.
We haven’t found that calm while enjoying our own journey.

If we are truly focused on our success, we can never be offended by someone else’s.

We are starting something new.
A new job. A new relationship. Moving to a new city.
And we’re scared.
We fear that we might fail.

However, what is it that we are really afraid of? Failing, or what will people think of us once we fail? 

All of us fail.
All of us are scared of it.
But when we introspect and get comfortable with what will make us uncomfortable in the first place, the failure suddenly doesn’t look scary! 

Failure is a probability of an outcome that will occur. We can’t avoid it.
What we can change is how we deal with it by asking ourselves the question: What is it that I am afraid of?

In a job, we often ask ourselves such questions
What do I want?
Why am I not being given what I was promised?
What is it that I like doing?

Essentially we want our needs to be attended to, while in a job.. However, no company does anything for us, whatever they do is for their own good. If it helps you in the process, great! 

How can one find success working in such a set-up?
By asking ourselves a question:
“What can I do to be successful?”

Success at work isn’t about our expectations being met.
Success at work is about asking what is needed to be successful.

What should I do in my life?
How to know what is right for me?
What if I make the wrong decision?

When we are thinking about decisions in our 20’s, no decision is a bad decision. You are so early in the game that your first steps won’t determine your final destination.

However, the way you take your decisions will set up the right habits or not, for the entire journey ahead.

The decision that will hurt you the most is not making one, while waiting to take the right one!

When something doesn’t go the way we wanted it to, our brain goes into default mode of imagining the worst case scenario.

They’re not acting the way they should.
They don’t like me.
They must think I am useless. 

But what if this imagined world is just that. Imagined?
How would we ever see it differently from the reality? 

Before you assume, try this crazy thing: Ask!

You hate your job.
But you have a wonderful family life.
And you tell yourself that your life is balanced.

But is that even possible?

Can we be a totally different person in our work, from our personal life?
Is it possible to feel fulfilled with family if our work hours are stressed out?

If happiness is not present in every area of our lives, it is not present anywhere.

Humans do not live in different boxes. Our life, our happiness (and lack of it) is one indivisible whole.

We want to build that product.
Create a community of like-minded people.
Change the way things work.

But there is a lack of time. Or we are not sure if the idea will succeed. What will people say if we fail? 

How will we ever know the result until we do the work?

Intentions hold power only when they’re backed by actions.
Otherwise, they’re the lies we are hypnotising ourselves with.

A year from now you will wish you had started today.