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We chase goals, work hard towards them, and when we finally achieve them, we still feel incomplete. 

Why does that happen?

Because we tie our happiness to a place. 

Showing people that you can.
Proving them wrong.
Making sure you have their respect. 

It all becomes a journey where we couldn’t care less about the journey, because we have all our eyes on the destination. 

Except it makes us more drained out in the end.

I had a student come over my Instagram Live, who had been practising magic tricks for 6 years now, and baffled me with a few of his tricks on the show. 

He does not plan to make it full time, nor does he plan to monetise it. 

But just the fact of getting up each day and having something to progress to, has kept him through the troughs and valleys. 

Daily progress = daily happiness minus conditions attached.

Chasing daily progress is the ultimate antidote to the emptiness of chasing goals.

If given a chance to trade anything of the wealthiest people, what is the right thing to trade?

Their money? Status? Network? Hard work? Life Lessons?

The best thing to trade for is their curiosity.

What do they think about the most?
What is the pattern of their thinking?
What are their mental models?

Curiosity can make us figure out a way to make a motor car in a world where everyone wants a faster horse cart. 

Lack of it can make us believe we are meant for slow commutes forever.

Having wealth of the wealthy is like eating fish.
Having their curiosity is learning to fish. 

Our parents are the people we disagree with the most.

We have differing opinions on the smallest life issues to making big life decisions.

And that’s okay. 

Our parents need a different thing from us: Our presence.

When they were our age, they witnessed tremendous hard work, lack of opportunities, and struggle to make ends meet. 

Life hasn’t been easy for them.
But we can make it a bit easy, by being there for them – making them talk about their favourite topics (our childhood, their childhood), listening to them, or simply engaging with them.

People we love the most and vice versa need only love from us.

I’ll be happy when I find my partner.

I’ll be happy when my parents understand me.

I’ll be happy when my efforts are applauded.

I’ll be happy “when”…

When we attach a “when” to happiness, we make it conditional. 

Someone else has to take the responsibility to do something that will make us happy.
That’s a huge onus to place on those who aren’t even aware they are carrying a heavy load.

The safer and more convenient option is to own our happiness. 

To be able to control our factors and definition of happiness.
To be happy alone.

Happiness in relationships is not contingent. 

Happiness is a relationship with ourselves.
When we have that relationship right, we become happier in all other relationships.

“I don’t know what to do with my life.”

We happen to tell this to ourselves early in our lives, especially when we see people younger than us becoming successful YouTubers, rocking on Reels or becoming child prodigies – and our wanderings make us wonder if we will ever “make it” in life.

However, there’s only one kind of people that do not make it, if ever: Those who do not move.

For the rest of us, for those who keep exploring, for those who keep looking, and for those who are never satisfied with settling, we will somehow figure out what to do with our lives.

Success is in exploring, and not setting with your own mindset that doesn’t let us nurture.

We don’t start hoping we’ll get there.

We make strategies.
Plans.
Executing them to the T.

Then comes a huge black swan effect. 

At the moment we were waiting for it to get over, another one came in, sweeping away all strategies.

And when all of these do not work, then comes the hope. 

Hope that we will make it through this storm, like we’ve done through all of them.
Hope that there exists a light at the end of the tunnel, wherever the end is.
Hope that till we get to the end of the tunnel, we will be the light.

All our strategies didn’t account for what we are going through.
Hope is the only thing we’re left with – fortunately.

The trends have pointed out overnight stars.

There are people telling us how to get rich overnight.

And most of all, pop culture shows us ways to get rich quick instead of working at a corporate job.

However, in order to get to where we want to, we have to start at a place we perhaps dislike.

For our work to pay off exponentially, we must give our 100% to the work that isn’t our dream job.

Because at the end, what we do in “our dream job” won’t be any different from the work ethic and habit we cultivated in the work we hated. 

Our work changes, we don’t!

When someone tells you to not give your 100% in your work, it works 100% of the time to not listen to them even 1%.

When we point a finger at someone else, we are unable to join hands together.

When we think someone else is wrong, we hardly stop to think they could be right in their shoes.

When we confront, it is in accusation mode instead of access mode.

It’s easy to win conversations by gathering all the evidence against someone.
It’s difficult to gather all the reasons why they could be perfectly right.

Instead of winning conversations, having one helps.

When we think about why we got successful, we may call it our hard work, dedication of our parents, and our commitment. 

While all that is true, studies have shown time and again that the ones who got successful were because of a huge stroke of luck. 

Being at the right place at the right time.
Being picked by the right people.
Born in a country where we can grow.

All of this is something we cannot control.
But has hugely affected where we are.

Yes, we wouldn’t have made it without our hard work.
But we wouldn’t have made it without luck either.

It’s a privilege to be where our success has led us.
And the best thing we could do is help create luck in the lives of others.

Comfort is a trap.

It’s worth sacrificing – for your happiness and for your growth.
It sadly seduces us into believing that we don’t need to try.

However, one comfort is worth always living with: Comfort in your own company.

The world is designed to tell us to hang around people, be like them, talk like them, and do everything that makes us fit in. 

Finding comfort in your own company and growing your relationship with yourself is the only comfort to forever strive for.