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Spend time with people who are not like you. You don’t want your world to create a bigger version of you. You want it to create a better version of you.

That happens when beliefs are challenged and debated.

It never helps to stay with your existing beliefs.
What helps is to create new ones.

The bubble you live in will only burst your ego if you keep inflating it.
However, if you explore new bubbles, you will discover you have so much to learn, other than keeping up with your ego.

The key is not to disregard what you see as right.
The key is to pay regard to what others see as right as well.

Destiny is what happens to you. Life is how you choose to react to it.

You failed an exam. Or suffered a job loss. Had a heartbreak.

That’s destiny. You couldn’t control the outcome.

However, you can control what you do from now on.

Do you blame someone else? Wish they could have done something?

Or do you decide to control your actions from now on?

The inputs (i.e., the responses) you put in today will create the outcome from now on. And create your life.

Destiny happened. But what after that? Did you happen to destiny in return, or did you let destiny happen over and over again?

As a leader, you will most likely suffer from what I call ‘the curse of intelligence’ – the desire to solve every problem thrown at you.

Great leaders don’t solve problems.
They ask the right questions.
And the questions solve the problems.

As a leader you most likely know what the solution is.
That’s not the problem.

The problem is, have you tried to understand what the other person is going through?
Perhaps their problem is something you would have never gone through.

It is in such tough times for others that the real task of a leader begins.
More listening, more understanding, more asking questions.
The answers? Your team is smart enough to reach them when you ask the right questions.

The hard thing is not to offer simple answers.
The hard thing is to allow people to look at the problem.

Speak not with the intent to convince, but with the intent to explain.

Listen not with the intent to answer, but with the intent to understand.

Whenever you go through a difficult life situation, the world advises you to move on.

I’d suggest otherwise.

Don’t move on immediately.
Reflect.
Spend time with yourself.
Ask yourself “What is it trying to teach you?”
Get comfortable with what happened.
Take the time to make it a life lesson instead of life tragedy.

And over time, you would have moved on automatically.

The way out of bad things in life isn’t by running away from them. It is rather by staying with them, so that over time and after giving all the lessons they brought, they go themselves and never come back again.

People love to help others. Influencers love to help. People with “outward success” love to help others.

However, when we do not receive help, it may also be because of the fact we were not specific.

“I feel bad.”
“Give me any job.”

OR

“I do not feel seen when X happens…”
“I have done x, y and z at work, and this is how I would be able to do a, b and c for you…”

People would love to help if they are helped on the kind of help they are being sought for – which unfortunately most people don’t do the hard work on. Don’t be most people :)

People don’t change. They just reveal themselves.
It’s your responsibility to be with people who are worth your time.

Can you think of a good friend who recently turned toxic?
Guess what? They were toxic all of the time.

You just didn’t realize it before, because subconsciously you believed they’d change. For the better.

Now you believe they have changed, for the worse.

No, they haven’t! They have just revealed that part of themselves that you had ignored for the longest time.

Now that you know that people don’t change, it’s not weird, it’s liberating.

Because you now know whom you can choose to spend your time with.

Isaac Newton attributed the secret of his success to the fact that he stood on the shoulder of giants.

So is the case with every success we achieve.
No one is self-made, even though it looks on the outside.
Behind our victory are multiple people who saw the best in us when we lost it for ourselves, and those are the shoulders we were blessed to stand on.

No one gets it done alone. No one.

The biggest myth about life is that we can get successful without ever facing failure.

That’s the biggest failure.

The most successful people are the ones who fail the most. And choose to reflect instead of regret.

Not needing someone else’s validation.
Or adhering to their definition of success.
Or sticking to the status quo because everyone else does it.

They are uncomfortable and unhappy doing it, yet they do it because no one told them that they can stop!

If there’s only one thing you need to You don’t need to do what everyone else is doing, and you will end up accomplishing what everyone else accomplishes.

Don’t lose yourself because you found somebody.

I am not talking about relationships.

I am talking about everything!

Got a great job? Doesn’t mean you don’t need ‘me time’.
Got friends you love? Doesn’t mean you won’t stand for your choices.
Got a great family? Doesn’t mean that your individual needs don’t matter.

You matter.

Your choices matter even if you are ‘happy’ on the outside.

You can never be truly yourself unless you nurture yourself in the middle of everything you are blessed to have!