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Don’t lose yourself because you found somebody.

I am not talking about relationships.

I am talking about everything!

Got a great job? Doesn’t mean you don’t need ‘me time’.
Got friends you love? Doesn’t mean you won’t stand for your choices.
Got a great family? Doesn’t mean that your individual needs don’t matter.

You matter.

Your choices matter even if you are ‘happy’ on the outside.

You can never be truly yourself unless you nurture yourself in the middle of everything you are blessed to have!

People get most upset when you tell them the true things that they wish are false.

It is perhaps your fault.
You could have done better.
Maybe you could be more understanding.

In a problem, there is often more than one person involved. However, if one person could have acted different, things would have been different. Certainly for the better.

But to own that different thing requires being okay with the truth that we wish was false.

When people are looking for more lies to cover up their lies and you tell them the truth, they don’t like it.

Truth never gets loved. Because it stands alone.

‘Oh, you are now going to tell me what to do? Have you looked at yourself?’

The biggest mistake people make is to reject the right advice because it comes from someone who didn’t take the advice themselves.

Ever saw someone giving advice who themselves did not follow it?

It is not them who is speaking.
It is their regret.
It is their ‘what if’.

It is their unbearable pain of ‘not being able to go back in time’ that makes them give that advice.

Perhaps that is the reason they are giving that advice!
Caring about the advice more than the source of it sometimes could be redemption!
Often, for more than one person.

Best way to become a good listener?

In a conversation, don’t speak unless asked to.

You cannot be a good listener and speak the most in a conversation.
Only when you decide to speak when asked to, do you listen to everything that is not even said.

The one who listens, reflects and creates something new.

The one who speaks before they are asked to, simply amplifies what they already know. And what they don’t.

The desire to get rid of desires is also a desire.

The real desire is to get to a place of not having the desire to get rid of desires.

The best way to make sure people don’t make fun of you, is you stepping up to make fun of yourself.

The best way for people to take you seriously is you not taking yourself seriously.

There is depth in humour.
That comes out when we don’t dwell in the vagarities of our ego to feed what we are feeling bad about, and go with the flow of letting things just be.

This New Year, here are three things you must NOT do:

1. Don’t set goals. Set habits. Habits make you the kind of person you intend to be. Goals make you feel bad after they are achieved.
2. Don’t beat yourself up. If you are holding yourself responsible and accountable, the last thing you should do to yourself is beat yourself up.
3. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. No one started same. You have your own journey. Finding joy in it, is the most powerful step to growing in this, and every year.

Here’s to a rocking 2022!

The biggest lie ever sold.

Something is NOT better than nothing.

Because when you are caught up in the chase of something that is worthless according to you making yourself miserable, you do not get the space to reflect, move forward, and decide the path you want to tread on next.

Sometimes, nothing is better than something.
That is when we figure out our next big thing.

Most of lessons learnt in life are not sought proactively.
They’re rather happening to us all of the time.
If we are reflective enough to listen.

Every life is a platform, Marianne Williamson says.
What happens on that platform is unique to us.
How we respond to what happens to us on that platform is the platform we choose to build for our tomorrow.

Thus, no matter where we are, we always have the choice to build our platform.
Should we care enough to be aware that we have the choice :)

Because I have made terrible mistakes.
Because I was clueless when I made those mistakes.
Because I never knew if life would ever get better again.
Because those make me real – that I am not a know-it-all guy, rather someone who is work in progress.
Because we all are shaped more by what we thought would work out and it tanked badly – and gave us shock instead of surprises.

I share my failures, so that you get to reflect on your own, and do not get deluded that “successful” people don’t have any.