We don’t choose our parents.
Nor can we choose how they conduct themselves as parents.
Or the repercussions of it.
But we do choose what to do to ourselves, once we are aware of what happened.
We can either blame them for our lives.
Or we can choose to heal ourselves.
Both are going to be painful, but choosing pain to heal is a preferable place to be in, than choosing pain to add to existing pain.
A part of growing up is being able to parent ourselves, if we believe we deserved better.