I’ll be happy when I find my partner.
I’ll be happy when my parents understand me.
I’ll be happy when my efforts are applauded.
I’ll be happy “when”…
When we attach a “when” to happiness, we make it conditional. Someone else has to take the responsibility to do something that will make us happy. That’s a huge onus to place on those who aren’t even aware they are carrying a heavy load.
The safer and more convenient option is to own our happiness. To be able to control our factors and definition of happiness. To be happy alone.
Happiness in relationships is not contingent. Happiness is a relationship with ourselves. When we have that relationship right, we become happier in all other relationships.
I really needed to read this today. It’s so true that we shouldn’t put the “remote” to our happiness in someone else’s hands, but being 17 makes that advice feel a lot harder to actually follow. I struggle with feeling lonely when I see all my friends out and about, and I don’t have that same group to hit up. I’m trying to work on my mindset, but honestly, feeling like I belong and having those connections is still what makes me feel the happiest right now. Thanks for sharing this, it’s given me a lot to think about regarding where my own happiness actually comes from.