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Overthinking is a thing. The next time you have it, before an interview or life problem, remember this:

1. We are all hardwired to think more about the bad, than good.

We are all afraid about, “What will Sharma Ji ka beta achieve?” or “Will people laugh at me?”, hardly being aware of the fact that no one is actually thinking of you in the first place.

2. Our mind focuses on possibilities. Not probabilities.

Is it possible that you’ll be fired: YES
Is it possible that you’ll not make it through the interview: YES
Is it possible that you will be poked for someone else’s mistake: YES

However, what is the probability?

Each time we step out, there is a possibility of getting hit by a bus. But we still step out fearlessly, right? How come?
Because our brain knows that the probability of that is low.

That is it!
The way to “solve” overthinking.

Make your brain aware of the probability of what disturbs you! 

Realise you are not alone in thinking of the bad more than the good.
And realise that when YOU are convinced that the probability of that bad thing is low, your mind will automatically be convinced.

1. Do not engage in office gossip. Ever.

If you encourage gossip on someone else, you will certainly have some gossip around you too.

2. Get to know your colleagues beyond work.

What drives them, what doesn’t.
Who they are, beyond their role and designation.
It will make working with them smoother.

3. Choose to deliver only A-quality work.

Your work is your signature.
So is a lack of good work.

One of my favourite self affirmations is “I am enough”. 

However, it suggests I believe I do not have to grow any further.
But that’s not true. 

The actual affirmation is “I am enough, at this moment.” 

It is my way of not blaming myself for where I am.
Instead feeling responsible for what I ought to do.
Which is to keep striving to get better. 

This quote by Sophia Bush beautifully summarises it:

“You can be a masterpiece and a work in progress at the same time.”

I believe we all have 2 lives.

One, that we spend earning the money that we need in life, to have enough.
Two, that we live once we have lived the first.

Money is important.

It buys you peace of mind.
It buys you health.
It buys safety.

But, at the same time, do not run after it endlessly.
Know how much is enough.

Around 28, I came up with that number. And have worked towards that.
Today I have it.
So, I do not need to run after it anymore.

Find that number for yourself.
And do not feel any shame, chasing that number.

And once you have it, live your second life.
Where you do not chase anything.
Except your inner voice.

PS: This video may help – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13nhoS_XYfg 

Don’t dismiss yourself before anybody else does.
Give yourself that chance. 

Free yourself.

The one decision that will affect EVERY area of your life meaningfully is picking the right partner.

This is because, your partner affects:

– Your financial life:

To have the same financial goals and use money in similar ways makes life less about convincing and figuring out, and more about living it together.

– Your physical life:

Your workout habits, your eating habits, your binge-eating habits, your sleeping habits – all have a direct impact on how you live your life.

– Your emotional life:

Stability in your relationship with your partner will eventually determine how emotionally stable you are in every other relationship you have.

Making this one decision wisely will determine almost everything in your life, meaningfully.
Not to be made in haste :)

We think of luck as something beyond our control.
Which makes us helpless to it.

Luck is something YOU can influence.

Sit down with yourself, reflect on your life and make a list of all the times where you “lucked out”.

Go back further, to see if there was anything you did to create the foundation for that luck – such as I did by having a network of batchmates at ISB.

Once you find it, that’s what you can do more of – as a habit.
You are now increasing your chances to get lucky.

We can’t determine what will work.

But of all the things that we do, one is bound to work.
And that will make all the difference!

We drive an air-conditioned car and get mad when the bicycle comes in front of us.

We walk into an interview hall and judge the person dressed shabbily.

We speak in English and laugh at those who don’t know how to pronounce cafe. 

We judge those that try to save 20 rupees at the vegetable store.

We feel losers are losers because “if only they worked harder”.

If only we realised that not all success is due to hard work.
And not all failure is due to laziness.

When you are working towards something, there is always hope. 

Hopelessness is felt on two occasions:

1. When you haven’t yet started and feel there is no way you can (untrue more often).
2. When you achieve what you wanted but it doesn’t change how you feel (true more often).

1) What is your happiest memory of us?
2) How was the first year of parenthood for you?
3) What is the nicest thing I have ever done for you?
4) What are the best & worst parts about getting older?
5) What’s one thing you want me to always remember after you are gone?